Have you found yourself asking, “How Can I let go of what I no longer need?” Do you keep gifts you dislike because you are afraid of hurting someone’s feelings? Would you like to clear some physical clutter but are afraid someone will visit and notice you don’t have their gift? Are you holding onto something you don’t use because you paid a lot of money for it? Are you ready to let the insignificant stuff go?
This month is about love. Self-love, in my view, is where it begins. When you love yourself you won’t tolerate people who don’t treat you well, you won’t surround yourself with stuff you don’t use or need and you are able to attract lots of good in your life.
I am always working on self-love. I believe we are these perfect beings when we are born and then crap happens. Teachers, society, family, and friends and we forget the magnificent brilliant beings we are. Going to focus all this month on self-love and self-care. When we increase our love and self-care for ourselves, we can shift our life as well as change the energy of the planet.
I am going to focus on physical clutter because most of us have stuff hanging around that we don’t love and might not even like. I always talk about the inside and the outside reflecting one another. By taking care of and loving what you own, good practice in taking care of yourself and making sure you have people that love and support you in your life. When you declutter in one area, you affect others around you.
Look around you. Do you love everything you own? How about most of it? Some of it? None of it? Yes, I have worked with people who have owned stuff they didn’t like for a variety of reasons.
Let’s start purging what you don’t love. Now, if you are using something or needing something and may not love it, you don’t have to necessarily purge it. An example I would use is we have a coat tree to hang coats. It is in constant use all year round. We have an odd-shaped closet downstairs that doesn’t fit much. After being annoyed for years, I finally purchased a coat tree. Do I absolutely love it? No, and I use it every day. Maybe I will replace it someday and it works for now. A mistake people sometimes make is going crazy with purging.
I am going to suggest concentrating on things you don’t love and aren’t using or needing and that is a high priority.
Are there any wedding gifts you need to release? What other items do you no longer love? What are your piles saying about you?
I know some of you reading have stuff you can purge RIGHT NOW that you know you don’t love, like, need, or use. I am going to encourage you to let that go right now. Make a list of all of that or if you are listening and doing it, get it in the donate pile right now. We’ll talk about some of the challenges that may come with that in a moment.
Okay, so if we have made our list or have items we know that we can release right now, let’s dig a little deeper.
Are you able to tell if you really love an item? It’s okay if you can’t. This is probably a bit harder than people realized. I feel we are really conditioned in our society to buy buy buy. I remember after 9/11 one of the things they encouraged us to do was buy. I remember that the most. Maybe they encouraged volunteering, donating blood but that was what stuck with me.
How do you know if you love something? Things to consider: Does it make you happy, bring you joy or pleasure? I love original artwork and buy some when I travel, usually from street vendors. Every time I see the art, it triggers a nice memory.
Do you feel good when you see or use it? What’s your initial response? If you don’t, that can be a quick reason to release it right now. Many people hold onto things that don’t make them feel good. I have had clients hold onto items from failed relationships.
Ask yourself do you really love it? Really, really love it? How does your body feel when you ask that question? I close my eyes when I do something like this to quiet my ego. This is really great for the closet too. If you don’t really love it and feel like a million bucks in it, why do you still have it? Again, if you use stuff every day—my gym clothes aren’t fancy and I don’t feel fantastic in them, but I am utilitarian in my gym clothes. They fit and keep me comfortable when working so I don’t feel I need to super love them.
Or does something like obligation creep up? If so might not be something you love. I am going to be talking about obligation again.
Why would you hold onto something you don’t love or use? Is it because you are worried that you will offend someone if they see you don’t have the item anymore? Let’s talk about that. How would you handle it? In all reality, 99% of people would be okay. The 1%? Maybe you need to evaluate that relationship. If it is someone close, say a parent or a sibling maybe you can invite a deeper conversation. Remember, what others do and say is about them and how you respond is about you.
Are you afraid you might need it someday? Trust you will get what you need when you need it. I tell my clients this all the time.
Think of these things as you go through them. How can you release them? Do you need to hire someone to support you? Work with a trusted friend? Have memories come up and counseling might be helpful?
Do you have collectibles? Do you have them because you love collecting or it was something that was started for you as a child and you just kept with it? Maybe you liked it 10 years ago, and no longer do. Why not give away or sell an outdated hobby or Internet or collection and make way for something new to try.
Look at memories. Remember when everything has value, nothing does. I say this often. If it is collecting dust in the garage how important is it? I love our wedding album and look at it a few times a year. I would never give that up. Same with our wedding video. I get the hubs to watch it once a year and I love it. Well, mainly it looks like it was from the 80s even though we were married in 2013. Don’t equate love with time spent as my wedding memorabilia illustrates.
Do you love the memorabilia you hold onto? Is there a way to get creative, like taking digital photos or making a cool wall hanging? If not, do you want to keep something boxed up and collecting dust?
The goal is to be more discerning about what is important, what brings you joy.
Take actions from the blogs on How Can I Let Go of What I No Longer Need?:
- What items can you release RIGHT NOW that you don’t love?
- Pick one room and begin releasing physical stuff you don’t love.
- Dig a little deeper. Are there any times you are holding onto out of obligation? Because you might need it someday? Consider journaling and seeing if something pops up. Create a game plan to let the more challenging items go.
- Ask yourself if you are honoring your memories. If you aren’t, how can you do that (by creating a quilt, etc.) If you don’t want to spend the time or effort to honor, can you release it?
What physical clutter can you release right now? What memory can you keep while letting go of the physical objects? What collections can you clear?
DIY Options to Clear Clutter
Purchase Julie’s books on how to clear clutter from your life: https://www.amazon.com/Julie-Coraccio/e/B07JGGL7ZL/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0
Subscribe to Clear Your Clutter Inside & Out Podcast https://reawakenyourbrilliance.com/resources-concierge-services/podcasts/self-help-podcast/
Check out more of my decluttering tips and how to get organized on my YouTube channel. https://www.youtube.com/user/SeibertRadio?feature=watch